"You ask and do not receive
because you ask amiss,
that you may spend it on your pleasures."
I was sitting in a doctors office the other day and chanced to pick up a small devotional book that caught my attention.leafing through it I saw a devotional entitled : "Me First". It .set me to thinking of how much I may have fit the mold.
A lot of us, who grew up in the Great Depression, did not enjoy the little frills of life. Perhaps some were able to get anything they wanted, but in my case nothing really came without effort. I was fortunate that my father was able to work, and we had food and necessities. Christmas was always good but in many cases gifts were home-made. I remember that I could say "I want that..." when we were in a store but more often than not, my father or mother would say, "I know you WOULD LIKE that, but we can't afford it right now." Fact of the matter is, there wasn't that much extra that we could afford bargain -price Saturday afternoon movies
Fortunately, I wasn't afraid to work doing things like pitching hay, shoveling manure, stacking a woodpile, or mowing lawns throughout our community. I didn't earn much but it was enough for a candy bar or two, a nickel soda, nails for my "cabin" upstream from our house, and cheap doo-dads from the local dime store.
When I reached adulthood I was convinced that our children would not suffer the privation I had experienced in childhood. But in honesty, I wanted to make up for lost time getting 'stuff" I wanted. .Christmas would roll around and we'd spend money we really couldn't afford. .I remember pawning a bowling ball one time so we would have hot dogs and beans for Thanksgiving. I wanted the latest hi-fi, stereo, color television, or car, even if it was at the expense of important things.
All those memories came back to haunt me when I saw that little devotional. I realized that there was a big difference between "I want" and "I need." I don't think I heard God very clearly when God was warning me about the hazards of the "I wants..".More likely I wasn't paying attention when His message was to live life according to his guidance - I was simply trying to do things MY way.
I hear Him more clearly today. There are still a thing or two I'd like but now there is a voice in my soul reminding me that other priorities are more important. I've come to the conclusion that needs are far more important than wants. I only wish I had heeded my conscience - God's voice - a whole lot sooner.
Father in heaven:
Even with our transgressions,
our selfish desires and preoccupations,
you still watch over us
and love us
in spite of ourselves.